Tự sự +18: February 2013

How it became a slave

A number of you have asked this slave to describe how it got to be the slave it currently is and it is happy to relate its story here.

This slave genuinely believes life is a journey, one that moves through many phases but that has some constant themes, some detours and blind alleys and to stretch the metaphor even further some favourite destinations that are often revisited. Life as a journey implies it is never over and is constantly changing. This slave believes its journey is not over but it is very happy and content with where it currently is. Life as a journey must also have a beginning a route that was followed to get to its current destination and so this is its story.

Childhood

it was born a few days into the 1970s in Yorkshire in the north of England and was a slim boy of average height. it had a good childhood in a loving family not being spoilt but getting generous Christmas and birthday presents, holidays in the UK , and lots of day trips away.

its earliest memories are of a hernia it got aged 4 and the repeated treatments it took to get rid of the excessive scar tissue due to its keloid skin. The scar was cur away twice and irradiated and it always remembers having to display itself to all its relatives so they could examine its scar above its groin and comment on it. At first this was humiliating but it soon became normal.

Commodore VIC20 home computer

When it started school it did well and it was basically a swot at school always being one of the best in class and regularly getting awards. it was not athletic and was really quite introverted with only a small group of friends. it was not bullied at school but basically kept itself out of the way and in truth it really enjoyed its school days. When computers came out it was hooked and its first home computer, a Commodore VIC-20, was one of its best ever presents.

Puberty and its Teenage Years

As it approached puberty around the age of 11 it started to play with itself, like all boys do, but right from the start its thoughts were always vaguely submissive. it did not know what it was doing and the thoughts were very jumbled but over the next year or two they settled into visions of it being restrained and repeatedly milked. The submissive thoughts expanded to include being kept in a dungeon and it was around this time, after a couple of years, it realised it was always submitting to a man. Being gay was very much secondary to its submission. it had no interest in submitting to a woman but equally vanilla gay sex did not interest it at all. it has a very tight foreskin so using its penis (especially in a condom) and simulating penetrating something was not very comfortable. It was not painful, just not comfortable which it is sure reinforced in its mind its submission and its sexual inferiority to other, real, men. it would have been, and still would be, very simple to do something about its foreskin but it knows this would not change anything about is true submissive nature and then, as now, it rarely thought about it and never saw it as a problem.

Schoolboy punished

Through its teens the fantasies while masturbating continued and strengthened to the point where it really could not ejaculate without them. it tested itself a little while masturbating with little pain (spanking etc) when it could and on one occasion managed to get all the skin on its penis and testicles to peel after it smeared them in washing up liquid (it cannot remember why it did this). it only really got into serious trouble at school once when it found £1 on the way to school and instead of handing it in it bought sweets for its friends. But it was found out and sent to the deputy headmaster where it was lectured and then given the slipper over its underpants. it was crying long before the slipper was used and it just could not cope with the situation at all. The only other memory of school punishment was being made to stand in the middle of the assembly hall during lunchtime, it was in the middle of school by the canteen and teachers staff room so lots of people walked past and saw it. it was very humiliated. These experiences did not feature in its masturbation fantasies initially but over time variations on them started to creep in with punishment sessions and being laughed at by groups of men before it was used for sex.

Tied to a tree

Through scouting on a summer camp it also witnessed a bondage session where all of us tied another boy to a tree and then stripped and teased him. Nothing happened of course but it cannot say it was not excited about that had happened and these scenarios, being bound outside, got woven into its fantasies. Scouting also introduced it, on another camp, to strip poker with other young guys and it has to admit that at times it was playing to lose. On one occasion it did end up naked but not exposed and the game ended before it went any further but the experience certainly added another element to its masturbation dreams.

In denial watching TV

Although the fantasies deepened they remained confined to its private, solo, sexual life and it pushed them aside at all other times always finding something else to do such as computing, scouts, reading or even just watching TV. it was in denial. As it got older it started to tell itself it would do something about its desires when it got to university and away from its parent's home. This saw it through its later teens and it still had no desire for vanilla gay relationship with a man and absolutely no thoughts at all about a woman.

University, Travel, and Work

When it got to university (in Manchester) where there was ample opportunity to discover itself it still continued to find excuses to not act on its urges and continued to push them away concentrating on work, drinking, and friends. it did expand its fantasies a little writing games of chance on its computer with foreits when it lost. These foreits would be self spanking, or press-ups, or masturbating without cumming etc but really were just an extension of its existing sexual fantasies limited to a very private world. The pattern of finding excuses and denying its future continued through its twenties first back at its parent's home for 2 years working as a management trainee, then on a 4 year world trip.

Around the world in 4 years

This world trip backpacking all over Africa, Asia, South and Central Americaand Australia, New Zealand, and the US was important in its life as it broke it out of its routine and gave it confidence to act. This confidence however did not yet extend to satisfying the submissive slave boy inside it and it still was not really identifying itself as a slave but knew without a doubt it had a deep need to serve to be happy. Back in the UK in its late twenties as it started a new job in London sharing a house with a friend it continued to find excuses. There was always something else to do, always a better time coming in the future when it would be easier to explore this and it was too easy to push it to the background except, of course, for its daily masturbation sessions and the occasional TV show covering, usually hetrosexual, BDSM lifestyles. The TV shows did help it to identify with idea of its as a slave and started to make it think about if this could be reality. One program stands out in its memory that discussed the lifestyle where after a few words the mistress gagged the male slave for the rest of the interview. However despite these stimuli it continued to do nothing about its own needs and work filled most of its life.

Living Alone and its First Steps into slavery

It was only when it moved into its own place in its early thirties that things started to change. it no longer had any distractions to divert it. it no longer had any reasons not to explore its submissive side and it had plenty of nights at home alone to do it. The other thing that had changed of course was the internet making exploration of what was possible so much easier. its exploration started online with a UGAS Pass to some gay male fetish sites and then it quickly moved to looking at Yahoo groups (even now it still is subscribed to a large number of groups). Yahoo was great with a wide range of interests, a lot of spam but also a lot of information. it then moved on to eBayand started buying all sorts of equipment but with nobody to use it on it. This kept this slave happy for around eighteen months along with a number of books it started to buy from various websites. Obsessed with eBay

its submissive inner self was expanding beyond its masturbation fantasies to fill large periods of its free time on multiple evenings in a week and at the weekend. Looking back it was obsessed with the thoughts of the BDSM Master/slave lifestyle and its inability to truly act on them but spend hours online and lots of money on eBay was getting unhealthy.

CB-3000 chastity cage

The next stage in its development was achieved really by accident. it had been spending larger and larger amounts on eBay and eventually it bought itself a chastity cage (a CB-3000) which is started to wear and soon got used to and wore for longer periods. This removal of its masturbatory outlet for its submissive urges is what drove the change and it finally took some action. First it went to a fetish night at theCentral Station Underground club in Kings Cross. The night was Feet Meet and this slave watched the activities for most of the night but it did end up getting into a reciprocal foot licking session with a guy. His licking of its feet did nothing but he told this slave it had done a good job on his feet and it made it feel twelve feet tall. Nothing else happened that night but it was on a high for days. This activity in the real world liberated this slave's desires and this led to its second action registering on a Gay BDSM site called Informed Consent with a realistic profile and a genuine desire to act on it.

A Master looking for a slave

it had always been led to believe there were a dozen slaves for every Master so it did not expect too much but it sent respectful messages to three Men. Next day it was amazed to see it had six messages waiting for it one from each of these Men and then three others. it was amazed at the response and of course still a little naive in the value of these sites but they were not as common as now and not as full of time wasters. it had an amazing two weeks interacting with these Men and they remained as keen as it did. it was starting to arrange to meet them when the Feet Meet night came around again.

BDSM Rights flag

The night at the club was busier than its previous visit and it talked to a few men. it spent quite a while talking to one man about what it had been doing for the last couple of weeks and it was truly shocked when He revealed Himself as one of the Masters it had been talking to. He had been impressed with its honesty and said He wanted to test it to see if it was suitable.

Accepted as a slave

it was crunch time and it knew that in a few short hours it could potentially be another Man's slave. it was scared, excited, happy, and apprehensive all at once. He tested it first by telling it to stay where it was while He went off to watch a bit of a show across the club. it did as it was told of course and it kept thinking over what it was doing. If it had not been for the preceding three weeks in the chastity cage it might have run off at that point but it was the right time for this slave and its mind and body was ready so it stayed where it was. He did eventually come back and commented it had stayed where it was so maybe it was time for a full inspection. He made a comment about it not being ready for that in the open bar area so took it to the toilets where He had it strip naked and He inspecting it testing all its body front and back. He had it remove the CB-3000 (and there was a bit of a smell) but He carried on. it will never forget when He finished and told it to dress and find Him in the bar He went and thoroughly washed His hands like He had been touching some unclean animal - that thought stayed with this slave for a long time and it still remembers it now. It was its first real introduction to the power of humiliation and the true change in the balance of power between a slave and its Owner.

A collared slave

Back in the bar He had it lick His feet and hands which it enjoyed and He complimented it on before He drove it back to its home talking in the car. it had a Master and it was a trainee slave. it was not allowed to call itself a slave it had to earn that privilege. On the journey it had to remove its shoes and trousers and He talked with it about slavery. A lot of the conversation was a blur but it does remember saying it would say no to things like getting in the boot/trunk of a car of a man it did not know. At the end of the journey He allowed it to put its trousers back on but did not mention the shoes. He asked if it wanted Him to come in. it said no. The no was for two reasons, the first was that its flat was a real mess but secondly, and more importantly, it had had big night and needed time to think.

A CP session with the cane

The next six months were some of the happiest of its life. Master used His trainee slave twice at is home and every month at Central Station at Corporal Punishment nights. it was not sure it was into CP but it responded well to the cane and got into a routine of spending a couple of hours naked in the club being caned by Master and His friends then standing in the corner with its hands on its head when not in use. The CP was good but the standing in the corner waiting to be of further use was even better and it really got inside its head realising it could easily walk away but never actually wanting to and waiting eagerly for more use while it was completely ignored. it was kept in chastity month to month and Master would show it off in its cage at the club. He would also have His slave display for other Superior Men in the club for Them to inspect it.

A slave being sold

its whole life changed over those six months as it felt liberated and freer that it ever had which might seem odd given it had surrendered itself as a slave to its Master but it definitely had a spring in its step and the world was good. it came out as gay at work and even told a couple of close friends about its new life as a slave which liberated it even further. But, there was a problem which was that it was only being used once a month and its slave self needed more. Master did not have the time for that so He agreed it should be transferred to the control of a new Master. The exchange happened quickly but not totally smoothly. it had remained talking occasionally to one of those original six responders to its Informed Consent profile and it quickly found itself having a drink with, and then being tested by Him and He quickly became its Master. He had much more time to train and use a slave. it was supposed to be transferred between its old and new Master but it did not work out and in the end it had to transfer itself to its new Master although it remained friendly and respectful of its first Master.

Master Andrew

Master had a lot more time for His slave and it was serving Him every weekend for the whole weekend and it got lots of use. it learned all Master's are different and it had to adapt to the demands of its new owner who was more physical and less into psychological control than its first Master. Like all relationships it had ups and downs with some great periods and some less good. Both Master and slave had big changes in their personal lives in the first 18 months which caused something of a wedge initially but then brought us closer together.

it is not going to go into detail about it current slavery (its rules, contract and journal are all on thiswebsite. However, it does need to say it got to serve Master regularly in a variety of ways but over the years its slave life started to get a bit stale and slave's work got busier and became something of an excuse to get in the way. its relationship with Master strengthened and deepened but the extent of its use as a slave started to recede. Given its and Master's other commitments this was allowed to happen.

By the time it had been with Master for five years it was committed to Him as a Man but its slavery had been reduced to nothing more than fairly formulaic use at the weekends when it was not too busy with work. This needed to change and Master and it decided to take action. it involved resetting and strengthening the rules, setting lots of new rules and enforcing them, slave committing to live as a slave 24/7, and the introduction of third parties to the relationship in the form of other Men for slave to be loaned out to or other slaves for it to train as sub-slaves for Master.

This new regime has just started and the final stages of it are still being completed but it is looking forward to a long, varied, and demanding future as its Master's slave.

Thông tin tổng quát về bạn của tôi
(những ai có nhu cầu làm nô/chủ nô thì vui lòng đăng ký gởi thông tin như bên dưới qua hộp mail cá nhân, và để thông tin đáng tin cậy nên kèm theo files hình liên quan và không cần thiết phải cho thấy rõ toàn bộ khuôn mặt trong hình được gởi kèm (thường hình được gởi là hình chụp nude, tư thế đứng thẳng, hai tay để thả lỏng tự nhiên hai bên, hình chụp từ phía trước và hình chụp từ phía sau để kiểm tra dấu hiệu hình xăm trên cơ thể và bệnh lý về da liễu, các hình liên quan khác nếu cần thiết...,và điều quan trọng là mọi thông tin gởi đến đảm bảo giữ kín)

Giới thiệu chung

:

là straight 100%, được huấn luyện biết cách phục vụ ông chủ và sẳn sàng chịu trừng phạt nếu làm không đúng ý và có thể chịu trói trong tư thế trần truồng liên tục từ 6-12 hay 24h tùy tư thế trói, chịu đau tốt, chịu đánh bằng roi để lại nhiều lằn đỏ có thể rướm máu nhưng sau đó phải được chăm sóc vết thương kỹ để tránh nhiễm trùng, chịu bỏ đói cả ngày và nhiều hình thức trừng phạt khác mà không gây nguy hiểm. Không quan hệ tình dục đồng giới.

Giới tính

:

Nam (straight 100%)

Tình trạng

:

Đang làm nô ngoài giờ

Năm sinh

:

1985 (Age 28)

Thời điểm làm nô

:

Tháng 11 năm 2000

Ông chủ hiện tại

:

Bình Minh (It's me..:))

Quan hệ chủ tớ

:

#1½ năm
từ ngày 1 tháng 1 năm 2012

Chủ trước

:

N/A

Hợp đồng chủ-nô

:

2 năm cho tới hết ngày 31 tháng 12 năm 2013

Nơi sinh

:

Tp Hồ Chí Minh

Chỗ ở hiện tại

:

N/A

Tên khi sinh

:

Phong

Tên khi làm nô

:

Nô

Dáng người

:

Trung bình, cơ săn chắc, bụng 6 múi.

Màu da

:

Vàng, ngâm

Màu mắt

:

Đen

Tóc

:

Đen, thường để đầu đinh

Chiều cao

:

175cm

Cân nặng

:

68kg

Chiều dài cánh tay

(đo từ cổ tay đến mép cổ)

:

67cm

Vòng cổ tay

:

16.2cm

Chiều dài chân

(đo từ mắc cá tới háng)

:

77cm

Vòng cổ chân

:

23cm

Vòng ngực trong tư thế bình thường

:

98cm

Vòng bụng trong tư thế bình thường

:

83cm

Bao quy đầu

:

Chưa cắt

Chiều dài dương vật khi mềm

:

4,5cm

Chiều dài dương vật cương cứng tối đa

:

12,5~13cm

Lông trên cơ thể: vùng ngực, bụng, chân

:

Trung bình

Lông nách

:

Trung bình

Lông vùng sinh dục

:

Trung bình, cạo sạch

Lông vùng hậu môn

:

Thưa, cạo sạch

Râu

:

Ria mép, cạo sạch

Răng

:

28 cái, không mất răng

Xăm mình

:

Không

Sẹo

:

Sẹo đứt tay ở đầu ngón trỏ, 1cm, sẹo nhỏ dưới 1cm vùng đầu gối phải, cùi trỏ phải

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Đêm cuối của 1 tuần phạt trói suốt đêm

Friday, February 8, 2013

Phạt đánh 50 roi vì vi phạm nội quy trong lúc bị phạt

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Phạt 1 tuần bị xiềng tay vào tường

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

How it became a slave (sưu tầm)